ZIM Helper - Diễn đàn hỏi đáp Tiếng Anh

Diễn đàn giải đáp kiến thức tiếng Anh luyện thi IELTS, TOEIC, luyện thi Đại học và các kì thi tiếng Anh khác. Được vận hành bởi các High Achievers.

Hoàng Thái05/12/2023
Writting task 2

Nhờ thầy cô chấm điểm bài viết của em với ạ, gồm các tiêu chí với lại những lỗi sai luôn ạ:
Nowadays celebrities are more famous for their glamour and wealth than for their achievements, and this is a bad example for adolescents. To what extent do you agree or disagree?  
In today’s modern society, celebrities often garner more attention for their opulent
lifestyles and affluence than for their actual achievements. Young people are
negatively impacted by this inclination. While I concur with this, since
excessive displays of wealth and an emphasis primarily on materialistic goods
can produce generations without morals and values, I believe that other famous
people act as positive role models. 

On the one hand, celebrities who emphasize their wealth and luxury rather than their accomplishments can have a profoundly negative impact on young minds. Instead of inspiring adolescents through their genuine achievements, these celebrities often resort to manipulating impressionable minds with a focus on their
ostentatious lifestyles. For example, Kylie Jenner, who is famous for her
reality show, usually shows off her palatial mansion, high-profile parties, and
opulent lifestyle instead of merely acting. Thus, young people may easily get
influenced by her behavior and her rich lifestyle, which would harm them. This
fosters unrealistic expectations and values centered around materialism, which
can be detrimental to the development of a healthy and grounded perspective. 

On the other hand, it is not entirely fair to blame celebrities for setting a bad example for young people. Numerous celebrities have dedicated significant effort to
attain success, with their wealth and glamour being natural outcomes of their
accomplishments. Take athletes, for instance, who undergo rigorous training for
years and achieve victory by earning medals and trophies; they merit the
rewards of their hard work. Similarly, prosperous entrepreneurs who diligently
build successful businesses have the right to relish the wealth resulting from
their dedication. 

In conclusion, I strongly agree that the current trend of celebrities being more renowned fortheir glamour and wealth than for their actual achievements is a detrimental influence on adolescents. However, it is not the whole picture, as most
celebrities work hard to gain fame and success.   

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